


The Problem Is This

by AlixxBlack



Category: The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: F/M, Relationship Issues, but he loves annabeth, emotional cheating, implied percabeth - Freeform, percy doesn't know what he wants because he doesn't feel wanted, percy hates himself, the tags are spoilers omg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-31
Updated: 2018-01-31
Packaged: 2019-03-11 17:26:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13529073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlixxBlack/pseuds/AlixxBlack
Summary: Annabeth is always leaving Percy behind for one project or another, oftentimes without warning. He shouldn't feel bad for having a good friend, right? Only - the problem is this - one thing always leads to another eventually.





	The Problem Is This

> _The problem is always the same._
> 
> _One thing - always - leads to another._
> 
> _I am looking at Reyna from across the fire pit and I’m thinking about the fact that she asked me out - kind of - a few years ago. I loved - love - Annabeth with everything I have to give, but when she storms out of the apartment and disappears without warning for days on end, it’s impossible to not feel left behind. I try to stop myself and my mind from spiraling out of control and thinking she’s left me for someone smarter, safer, or less ‘son of a big three god.’ There’s this worry that she’ll get sick of me. I’ll stop being enough._
> 
> _And I’m just looking at Reyna from across the fire pit but that’s the thing. That’s the one thing that always leads to another. I’ll look at her and she’ll smile, and then I’ll smile, and then she’ll ask if I want to go for a walk. She always needs  way to clear her head and I always need a reason to avoid the apartment when it is empty._
> 
> _Then a walk turns into drinks. Neither of us ever drink too much but somehow we always drink enough to feel comfortable saying whatever comes to our mind. Sometimes I tell her how beautiful she looks when she’s not dressed up for war and she’ll say how jealous she is that I already have someone to love, and it feels innocent until I’m walking her back to her private living quarters on the base. I linger at her door and form the outside it looks innocent but it feels anything but…_
> 
> _“Annabeth is very lucky,” she’ll say to me every single time. We’ll stare at each other really long and I know that I do that sideways grin that Annabeth laughs at and I’ll hear her laugh in the back of my head. I’ll feel sick to my stomach, then stumble down the stairs, and then just wave at her.  
> _
> 
> _“I think she probably feels the same,” and when I’m walking away from her she says in a flat voice that she thinks I don’t hear: “Probably isn’t the answer you deserve.” I know I should feel more confident in Annabeth’s love for me but I think I doubt it because I doubt myself.  
> _
> 
> _And here I am, just_ looking _at her from across the fire wishing that she were Annabeth instead of Reyna. I know I don’t love her the way she wants me to, and I know that Annabeth would dump me if she ever thought I was being anything but a good friend to someone that I trusted with my life, but I don’t stop myself._
> 
> _One day the real problem won’t be that one thing lead to another but that I let one thing become many things._
> 
>  

“Do you want to go for a walk?” Reyna whispers. I didn’t even see her come up to me. Everything in my wants to decline, I promise it. I try to recreate that laugh I love of Annabeth’s so much. I try to imagine her cooking in our kitchen or folding our laundry in her pajamas while trying to read her class notes from some big exam - because she’s double majoring, of course. I swear I try it all - from the first time I laid my eyes on her to three nights ago when we went skinny dipping after dinner.

For now, though, what’s the harm in one thing? “Sure thing, Reyna!”

 

> _When my reckoning comes, I hope I get the hell that I deserve._

**Author's Note:**

> I know what you're thinking, "Shame on you, Alixx, for making Percy such a douche canoe," and I also feel those feelings.


End file.
